Singer Jennifer Hudson arrives at the Pre-Grammy Gala presented by the Recording Academy and Clive Davis in Beverly Hills, California, January 30, 2010.
LOS ANGELES, June 30 � Oscar-winning actress Jennifer Hudson broke down as she spoke for the first time publicly about the murders of her mother, brother and nephew.
The one-time �American Idol� contestant, who went on to win an Academy Award three years ago for a supporting role in her feature debut �Dreamgirls,� said the 2008 triple-slaying was �surreal.�
�It�s all a blur. It was surreal,� she said during an episode of US cable channel VH1�s documentary series �Behind the Music� broadcast two days ago. �It was like I was outside of myself.�
The bodies of Hudson�s 57-year-old mother Darnell Donerson and 29-year-old brother Jason Hudson were discovered inside the home where Hudson grew up in Chicago. Her 7-year-old nephew Julian King was later found dead in a vehicle.
All three had been shot. William Balfour, the estranged husband of Hudson�s sister Julia, has been charged with the murders.
Hudson, now 28, disappeared from the spotlight for a few months after the murders, recalling that for two weeks she basically stayed in one room with family and friends.
�I prayed when I�d get up in the morning and prayed before I laid down at night,� she said.
Not long after the murder, Hudson got engaged to David Otunga which whom she had a son last August. Her debut self-titled album went on to win a Grammy award.
She said she knew she needed to get her life back on track.
�In so many ways I channel (my mother) because she was such a great mom,� said said adding that her son �makes me feel like the most special person on earth. I want him to get the same love and the same upbringing my mother gave us.�
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