Taylor Swift Forgives Kanye West
In an emotional performance, Taylor Swift forgave Kanye West for hijacking her speech at last year's show. A closer listen to her song, however, reveals that her lyrics do have some bite: �Thirty-two and still growing up now.�
Kanye Toasts Himself
In the grand finale of the show, an apologetic Kanye West toasted himself. While this seems like a logical move for the egomaniac, West�s catchy new song �Runaway� actually contains some not-so-flattering (and slightly NSFW) lyrics pertaining to himself. Yes Kanye, we have been putting up with your [expletive] for way too long. It was a �sincere� apology to Swift�which inspired the audience to give West a standing ovation while chanting his name.
Justin Bieber Gets Drummer Fever
Kim Kardashian kicked off Bieber fever by introducing her falsely rumored boyfriend and Best New Artist winner Justin Bieber. The tween sensation�s performance, seemingly designed under the assumption that if there are 9-year-olds on stage maybe he�d look older, had some strange vocals. Whether it was just nerves or lip synching is unclear, but Bieber tore it up with the sickest drum solo his audience had ever seen. An audience of prepubescent girls, that is.
The Return of the Lohan
As the first woman to host the VMAs in 16 years, Chelsea Handler needed all the inspirational spanks she could get before the show. But in a surprise twist to this opening bit, and in her first major role since being released from rehab, Lindsay Lohan showed that not only can she dole out a proper smack to Handler�s rear, but she can also poke fun at her own struggle with alcohol and the law. Here�s wishing Lohan the best of luck in turning her life around. Let�s hope she wasn�t invited to any VMA afterparties.
Lady Gaga and Legend Cher a Moment
Cher, the �oldest chick with the biggest hair� and a dangerously skimpy outfit at the show, presented the biggest award to the biggest winner of the night Lady Gaga. Accepting the Video of the Year award for �Bad Romance�, Gaga gave her little monsters a treat by announcing the title of her new record and singing the chorus to the album�s title song.
Eminem Sets Stage on Fire
After spending the better part of four years away from the stage while fighting an addiction to prescription drugs, Eminem opened the show by rapping �Love the Way You Lie� with surprise guest Rihanna. The real Slim Shady may be back, but he was unable to stand up to accept his awards for �Not Afraid�, because of a flight to New York for a concert.
Jersey Shore Hot Tub Knocks Up Host
Throughout the program Handler made some family-friendly jokes, like the one about Mrs. Bieber giving birth to her 401(k) plan. But it was when she was making crass jokes in a hot tub with the Jersey Shore cast, however, that she seemed to fit in fine. This may explain why by the end of the bit she was pregnant.
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